FLUX

My thoughts one September day (probably after hearing about more shootings or something of the like)…

What would happen if we really all did get along?

Would the greenhouse effect still exist?

Would there be quicker cures found for diseases?

Would the planet overpopulate?

Would there be just one faith?

Would we all live in one big house?

Would there be bills to pay?

Would there be a need for elections?

Would anyone be “poor?”

Would there be money or some sort of bartering system instead?

Would we marry each other?

Would evil still exist?

I know we have free will, make your own choices, carve the path you desire as good as you can, etc, but what good is free-will if in the end we are not good or as happy as we should be? Does anyone really think we are here to be unhappy?  I cannot comprehend why we choose to kill or hurt each other as we do.  We all desire to be happy and yet there are those of us who would rather lie, kill, cheat, and steal and not out of proper necessity either!  How do we not understand that if we just loved one another this world would be such a happier place for all of us?

My heart aches for the human condition.

Simplicity

I’ve experienced a lot in my life as have most by my age.  I’ve been referred to as “brave”, “strong”, and highly “resilient,” none of which would most likely be attributed to me had I not experiences where most people believe I should not have come out completely sane.  I do not see myself as special, but I do know that I needed help learning to value myself so I sought out assistance.  It may not seem amazing to most who read this, but below are some items that I had no idea were messages attributed to ‘shame.’  This was an incredible turning point in how I now view myself and the effects of what I have lived through on forming my personality.  Without God I would not be who I am because I’m most certain these messages would negatively effect the personality, i.e. contribute to negative behaviors, for most people.

“MESSAGES GIVEN BY SHAME-BASED SYSTEMS

CONTROL:  “It is important to be in control of your behavior and your interactions with others as much as possible.  Bad things will invariably happen if you lose control.”

PERFECTION:  “It is important to always be ‘right’ and always do the ‘right’ thing.”

NO TALK:  “Keep shameful experiences, behavior, and feelings a secret.  Never talk about them openly.”

DENIAL:  “It is important not to acknowledge feelings and needs-especially ones that make you more vulnerable or make you appear as though you have lost control.”

DISQUALIFICATIONS:  “When things don’t go as planned or expected, someone must be blamed.  If you can’t blame others you must blame yourself.”

UNRELIABILITY:  “Never expect things to go the way you want them to.  Be prepared for the unpredictable.  “Don’t expect constancy.  You can never feel secure in relationships.”

INCOMPLETENESS:  “Don’t even try to bring personal transactions or interactions to completion or resolution.  It just won’t happen.””

Adapted from: Fossum & Mason, Facing Shame, 1986.